How the “self help” industry secretly creates victims and dependency.

By October 27, 2015 Blog No Comments

I want you to enter a courtroom with me.

When I first entered a “modern” courtroom I was disappointed. I thought they were all like the courtrooms in “To kill a mocking bird”.

Grand things. With soaring ceilings. Balconies. Wooden (mahogany?) rails. Lots of people – intent on justice.

The corporate feel of my first courtroom – with the low ceilings, off white dust filled ceiling tiles and flickering and humming fluorescent lighting…just wasn’t the same.

But whatever you imagine in your mind…imagine it.

A courtroom. Mine is still like the one in To Kill a Mockingbird.

The actors that are the most important.

Imagine the judge with his hammer.

The prosecutor – with the list of everything to accuse the defendant.

Imagine the jury – each person with a different voice to proclaim innocence of guilt.

And the defendant…behind the table. The one being accused. The one on trail.


I want you to realize that each of these actors is YOU.

That you probably enter this courtroom every day…maybe every hour…or every minute…to accept a sentence of guilty or not guilty…handed down by you…

To endure the prosecutors accusation of wrong doings…read from a list written by you…

To listen to the voice of the jury. (You again…)

“But they deserved it…”
“But love wouldn’t do that…”
“But they know better…”

And finally…YOU. The defendant.

The one pleading the case. Awaiting a decision. Guilty…or not guilty…and regardless of the decision…

Knowingly entering the courtroom AGAIN the next hour…or day.

It really is a regular old racket.

And you’re the freaking star.


And this is where the self help industry preys on people…and they don’t even know it.

See – lots of the industry has the best intentions in mind. Right?

Reading books is a good thing. Learning is a good thing. New mindsets and education is a good thing.

(Heck – I’m publishing a book!)


Here is the catch.

If you’re addicted to something like the courtroom in your head…than new INFORMATION (a new book, a podcast, a technique, a strategy…) almost always increases the size of the prosecutors list.

“Jonathan, you read about this. You SHOULD have done it. You SHOULD be doing it. You SHOULD feel this way. You SHOULD implement it…”


THIS is why the self help (and spiritual) scene often roller coasters over time into a cycle of dependency – where we self help our way into guilt and shame.

Or religion our way into it.

Because when we walk out of the courtroom guilty – we are guilty of inadequacy. (We read it! We KNOW what to do…the prosecutor tells us…)

So what do we do from this broken place?
We find another book. Seek out more information. Gotta find something that gets it perfect. Something that saves us from this feeling of being trapped…something to “fix” us.

Now…is it powerful to collapse time and get outside resources?
YES. I’m walking testimony to the power of coaching and books. I consume more targeted information on personal and business expansion in a month than most people consume in a year.


If you’re addicted to your courtroom…watch out. It’s a recipe for disaster.

And too many coaches and self help people out there leverage the courtroom to create dependency…

Instead of equipping their clients to just stop entering the courtroom in the first place.

Sometimes one of the best things you can do for yourself is STOP consuming information. STOP READING.

I don’t care what Tia Lopez says. 😉

/// END RANT…for now.

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